Things have been quiet here in March. The early part of the month was spent concentrating heavily on job-hunting. (And on trying to avoid getting sucked down into the emotional mire of insecurity and uncertainty that can accompany that search.) Both struggles continue.
I also had a family vacation last week that was nearly two years in the making. (My mom is A Planner.) Mere days before I left, I learned a dear, dear friend passed away. I’m still struggling quite a bit with the complicated grief this news brings.* While I’m thrilled with my life here in Canada, being 1500 miles away from what I still think of as “home” is difficult at the best of times. When something like this happens, there’s another layer of guilt and helplessness and then a little more guilt for good measure.
So that colored the vacation a bit and led to sudden moments of deep sorrow in the midst of great natural beauty and family-induced joy. But it was still a truly awesome (in the awe-heavy sense of the word) vacation. I spent a week in a hacienda on a hill in Sedona, Arizona** with my immediate family*** and one aunt. It was lovely and rejuvenating, in part, because I mostly tried to unplug from social media and let myself off the hook for responsibilities like blogging and podcast production.
But now I am back, and trying to figure out how to slip back into my “normal” life again. I’m hoping to do better at finding time for all the important things than I was doing in the stressful weeks before I left. One of those important things is blogging here and getting back to my patron-inspired posts. I admit I was getting to the point where just thinking about that responsibility was anxiety-inducing, and I need to overcome that and get back on the horse!
In fact, I have watched another item for a patron. And it was something delightful! I’m looking forward to sharing it (and my thoughts on it) with all of you. Just need to find the time and brain cells for that, but I do expect to achieve that this week.
So. I’m back.
*Though it’s nothing compared to that of my wonderful friend Tanya–one of the best and most generous people I have ever known, who lost not only her husband, but her other half–a phrase that always seemed to mean more when applied to Tanya and Joel. And knowing how she’s hurting just makes me all the sadder. She’s one of those people I’ve always thought deserves a world of joy because she’s brought so much of it to so many others.
**The picture above is a panorama of the view from one of the three porches. Thanks to Steven for the pic!
***Minus my sister’s boyfriend who was in the hospital, which was the other major blight on the proceedings. We missed you, Sam!